Thursday, February 23, 2023

AI Poet 3

To be on the brink of colour

Coming out of shadows

Is to stand at the edge of a cliff,

With the wind in your hair


Your eyes catches the sunlight

The soothing hum of bees & birdsongs 

Vibrance of wheatgrass and red vines

Wild flowers peeking above shrubs


The sky moves in murmuring waves 

Painting each frame with shades of blue

Above the draping weeping willows 

Underneath your feet breathes life


At winter's end, there is a symphony

Between the soil & headless flowers 

All at once, their fragrance is a lilac melody,

A beckoning that rises and floats.


To be on the brink of colour,

Is to count past the days of grey

And long nights of white grief,

To grasp and take that very small step


To where light bounces from tree to tree

You stitch the colours inside your pocket

And spread the quilted blanket on the floor

Season of flowers is around the corner


*****


The poem above is a revised version of the AI poem below:

To be on the brink of colour,

Is to stand at the edge of a cliff,

With the wind in your hair,

And the sun on your skin.


It's to feel the world around you,

In all its vibrant hues,

To see the beauty in everything,

And feel it infuse.


The sky is a canvas,

Painted with brushstrokes of gold,

The trees are alive,

Their leaves rustling bold.


The flowers are a symphony,

Each petal a note,

Their fragrance a melody,

That rises and floats.


To be on the brink of colour,

Is to know that life is a gift,

To be savoured and cherished,

With every breath and lift.


For in every moment,

There is a chance to see,

The magic that surrounds us,

And set our spirits free.


So let us embrace the colours,

That paint our world so bright,

And bask in their radiance,

As we walk into the light.


This poem was created by Chat GPT:  To Write a Poem:   To be on the brink of colour.  This line is credited to Vikki on Twitter:

"To be on the brink of colour as if I've sorted the wrong days from the hapless season..." ~ L'Atelier De La Vie

Posted for dVerse Poets Pub:  Meet the Bar Artificially, hosted by Bjorn Rudberg.  Join us when the pub doors open at 3pm EST.  Thanks for your visits and comments. 


13 comments:

  1. The first part is my own poem. The second part is from the AI poem.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AI poems certainly need tweaking, otherwise they just look like pieced together bits of other poets’ work. I much prefer your version, Grace, especially the lines:
    ‘The sky moves in murmuring waves
    Painting each frame with shades of blue’
    and
    ‘To be on the brink of colour,
    Is to count past the days of grey
    And long nights of white grief’.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Gorgeous, gorgeous work done, Grace! I especially love this part; "At winter's end, there is a symphony/Between the soil & headless flowers/All at once, their fragrance is a lilac melody/A beckoning that rises and floats." ❤️❤️

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  4. You did it so well, with the rework... the original was much like all my efforts with chatgpt ... boring and repetitive. Your own poem is so much better (and I think you don't even need the AI generated one to do it)

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  5. Yours sounds pretty good after you tweaked it. Still it doesn't possess your magic.

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  6. I was stunned at first reading this because I thought AI had reproduced your poetic voice so accurately! Then I read it as an edit of the verbiage and hence such beautiful lines as
    "At winter's end, there is a symphony

    Between the soil & headless flowers

    All at once, their fragrance is a lilac melody,"

    ReplyDelete
  7. Glad you posted your version and the AI version. It's interesting to me to see the original AI as the jumping point....and then how it's adapted. I must say, these two lines really struck me:
    "At winter's end, there is a symphony
    Between the soil & headless flowers "

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  8. Sigh: happens to me every time, replay above (listed as anonymous at 4:37 PM is me....lillian. As is this one!

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  9. I think your own "tweaked" version speaks with a voice more authentic to you. The AI version reads like a greeting card - shiny and pretty, perhaps, but void of emotion and interest. Well done in taking the idea and playing with it though, but I most definitely prefer "Grace's words" in all their glory.

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  10. The only original image in the AI poem is the one you gave it. The rest is trite cliché. Although you reworked a lot of those tired images and gave the poem something more personal, it still doesn't read like one of yours.

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  11. I don’t know if you know this Grace, I just found out today. Our friend and fellow poet Glenn Butkus passed away last Friday the 17th. I will miss his bold ways. Rest in peace Glenn.🕊

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  12. Your rewrite was much more interesting and smoothly worded.

    Much💜love

    ReplyDelete

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