when i arrived
sky was dove grey
as your face, cloud-pinched
by pain
i wash your hands
fragile as crepe paper
soothing gentle words
believing
i give you relief
but torment is intense
your nerves are fire
you say,
being old is not fun
Posted for dVerse Poets Pub - Quadrille, hosted by De Jackson. This is a 44 word post with the given word, PINCH. Join us when the pub doors open at 3pm EST.
Aging like this sounds so bad... my mother in law went through some years in intense pain...
ReplyDeleteThis is deeply poignant writing, Grace! Aging comes with many challenges.
ReplyDeleteI reiterate the saying! this is very touching and graphic - especially the crepe paper hands. The quadrille brevity gives it an added twist too
ReplyDeleteSuch an intimate portrait in just 44 words <3
ReplyDeleteVery visual and moving, making me think of my mom's arthritis and the pains of the aging....or anyone with debilitating diseases. Love the hyphenation of "cloud-pinched".
ReplyDeleteoops, that was me
DeleteBeautifully written.
ReplyDeleteLove the dove grey and cloud pinched.❤️
ReplyDeleteA wonderful poem, Grace. Very sad when our bodies turn on us as we age. You sad heartfelt words ring true.
ReplyDeleteIt's those "crepe paper hands" that do it for me. Beautiful and sad, Grace.
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Beautiful words. Nicely done, Grace.
ReplyDeleteI feel this. Lovely write, Grace 💜
ReplyDeleteSo deeply touching; Grace. Thsnks for dropping by my blog.
ReplyDeleteMuch♡love
This is so full of tenderness and the sad reality of pain. Beautiful write.
ReplyDeleteThis makes you feel the pinched nerves and pains of aging.
ReplyDeleteThis really resonated with me as I just had a long conversation with my father-in-law who is 97 and feeling "done".
ReplyDeleteSo much emotion in just a few words.
ReplyDeleteWonderful words
ReplyDeleteGrace,
ReplyDeleteThe comparison of the sky to your loved one's face and the delicate imagery of washing hands are so poignant.
Sincerely,
David
SkepticsKaddish.com
The descriptions here are solid and powerful, especially "your face, cloud-pinched /by pain/i wash your hands /fragile as crepe paper" but every image pulls us into the room with you, yearning to give relief. Masterful writing, Grace, just brilliant.
ReplyDeleteI could never estimate how many times I believed my touch, gentle words, embraces were what my mother needed .... and now I wonder. Your quadrille is deeply touching, Grace.
ReplyDeleteThis is both lovely and heartbreaking. This so reminds me of my dear foster mom, struggling each day with age and Parkinson's. Beautifully written.
ReplyDeleteA beautiful post from a much-needed viewpoint. I've witnesses that stage with others too.
ReplyDeleteSo very tender. An incredibly touching take.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful to see the poetic craft applied to sad subjects so well Grace...
ReplyDeleteThis describes the angst of aging so well without direct comment, a powerful treatise on the body and age.
ReplyDeleteTouching and relatable, Grace. My mom's hands are 'fragile as crepe paper '!
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