Monday, October 18, 2021

scattered

we are stonewashed 

          by                river 

we are blistered grey

                       by              wind


yet you warm 

gaping hole           inside         our chests

           with tenacity of sunflower


bowed black

    seeds    all      stewed                 out

but standing tall,           unyielding


rid   our eyes

of                  ash

stir our words:       worthier           gladder 

<bravehearts>



Posted for dVerse Poets Pub - Quadrille, hosted by Sarah Connor.  This is a 44 word post, with the chosen word, ASH.   Thanks for the visit and comments.


29 comments:

  1. The format of this works so well... I see those stones tumbling in the river, abraded to smoothness.
    Like us we can find the end worthier and gladder.

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    Replies
    1. Yeah, uhm, wow. I mean... I know complimenting the form of the poem is the most obvious direction to go with this piece, but it's true - you did an amazing job, Grace.

      Much love,
      David [ben Alexander]

      Delete
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      Delete
  2. I agree with Björn - the 'tumbling' format works well. I love how the imagery builds to paint a picture of those true bravehearts who weather every storm!

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  3. I like the format, too. It's clever, but it doesn't take over from the words. I like the insistent strength here, the sunflower hanging on into the autumn.

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  4. This is absolutely gorgeous writing, Grace! The format works well to drive the message through. Especially love the "tenacity of sunflower." Sigh 💝💝

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  5. I agree about the format. It gives weight to each element of this fine piece.

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  6. I'm not usually a big fan of such (physically) scattered verbiage, Grace, but it's perfect for this piece. My hat is off!

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  7. “with tenacity of sunflower”

    I love that.

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  8. The spacing....the tumbling.....all adds to the depth of meaning here. stir our words.....worthier....gladder....such a beautiful and to me, soft and gentle ending.

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  9. Luv the character if the sunflower.

    Much💜love

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  10. Beautiful Grace! I love the tumbling, and the braveheart at the end.

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  11. A really wonderful piece, wish I had written it.

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  12. Lovely and interesting - the form is evocative, offering us the spaces in which to feel the weight, and yet, simultaneously offering us Light -

    There's a (bulldog) tenacity to this - a scarecrow flapping in the wind, sun-burnt and blistered - how elegant is this small poem? very - and (although I don't like using this word for its sometimes connotations, but not in this case) clever. A most unexpected and unusual treatment of "ash" in 44 words Grace!

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  13. Touching verses, I liked the form here, the words "scattered" as the title create space for thought.

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  14. not keen on this format but as the others have said it works well here. giving weight to the poem.

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  15. I love the physical structure of this poem, its excellent work :)

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  16. Very clever formatting. It took me a few attempts to fit the words into the spaces or note where language fell, but I enjoyed the process, and moreso enjoyed the poetry.

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  17. We need be "bravehearts" in these ashen times.

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  18. I wasn't sure what this was about. I have two images, of stones and sunflowers, both warmed by the sun and one enduring, the other enduring in its scattered seeds.

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  19. Your words are scattered like seeds on the wind, and your images fly like petals. Lovely poem, full of hope and beauty despite all odds.

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  20. A stirring that cleanses. I can feel it in your words.

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  21. A stunning use of form and images interspersed throughout Grace.

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  22. The form is phenomenal, I can feel the seeds disperse and though they never reform, they are too many to all be taken by winter's gray. SO beautiful.

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  23. The form is riveting and adds to its emotional depth, Grace. Love it.
    pax,
    dora

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  24. One of the best decision i ever made was contacting Dr Otonokpo to help me get my lover back, I was life filled with happiness after i contacted Dr Otonokpo because he didn't just bring my lover back to me he also made our love for each other more unique and superb. If you need to spice your relationship with more love and attention contact Dr Otonokpo on his Email Address otonokpotemple@gmail.com, call/whatsapp him via his contact +2348114129781 and be happy just like i am, thanks Dr Otonokpo for your great work.

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for your comments and visit. I appreciate them ~