settle me, leafy & limber as grape vines
upon pillows of leaves, a symmetry of green
i breath in your cool breath, light, green
on greening maple and oak trees, sky
clocks the long hours of daylight
rosy long hours of sunlight
in your greenness, i taste salt
of earth, & summer sun salting
my skin to brown, to flowering blooms, to pierce
my heart as a pear tree of flowering blooms, so fierce
for what am i without you
empty greenhouse, without you, greening
me with a thread of fire, greening
with threads of fire
Posted for dVerse Poets Pub - MTB: To turn again, about turn again. This challenge about epiphora, is hosted by Laura Bloomsbury. Playing with repetition to drive home the theme & message.
Join us when the pub doors open at 3pm EST.
The subtle repetitions here bring your poem to life with green, Grace. I also like the rhyme scheme and especially the lines:
ReplyDelete'for what am i without you
empty greenhouse, without you, greening'
When I look outside I see how green it is... everything but the sea and sky... green, and those long days. It is 9 PM and I still see sunshine on the roof of my neighbors house... and of course birdsong.
ReplyDeleteanother lovely lilting poem from you Grace - loved how you use both rhyme and end line repetition almost interchangeably so that they meld together with ease - a joy to read
ReplyDeleteI like how you used the repetition, like blossoms in a profusion of green. Favorite line:
ReplyDelete"for what am i without you
empty greenhouse"
So touching.
Love the repetition in your title and the way the word green is used in so many forms as noun, adjective, verb...it's as Laura mentioned the rhymes occur so naturally, this would sound so lovely read aloud!
ReplyDeleteI could fairly sense the scent of fresh green as I read your beautiful poem!
ReplyDeleteI love the first line--it really made me want to read the rest of your beautiful poem. I love all the different forms of green, the repetition, and the wonderful line breaks--really beautiful, Grace!
ReplyDeleteI liked your use of greening as a verb; we often think of things as green, but less so on the process of becoming green.
ReplyDeleteThe greening of spring is so uplifting. Your poem brings that joy home all the way through!
ReplyDeleteI felt my heart greening as I read your lovely poem...a vibrant spring song!
ReplyDeletethis felt like a babbling brook, flowing effortlessly through repetition of sounds and word-variations, subtle and succulent!
ReplyDeleteGreening is such a wonderful word. And the repetition works well to multiply it, like the growing landscape.
ReplyDeleteThe repetition is brilliantly done, but what I really like here is the enjambment.
ReplyDeleteColor me green, please color me green! Loved this, Grace.
ReplyDelete"in your greenness, i taste salt
ReplyDeleteof earth, & summer sun salting"
This along with all the lines are exquisite with the sense of completeness and union in the beloved. Beautiful.
~�� Dora
This is beautiful
ReplyDeletegreen is my favorite color ~
ReplyDelete