Thursday, May 31, 2018

The view beyond my sister's room





My body stretching like a tear
along the paper*

Static
   that second night 
   of mourning
My hands caught air
of your fragrance, 
   bamboo, eucalyptus,  
   aloe vera

My mom dragged her feet 
   in slow circles
while my brother silently grieved - 
   he's a wounded sparrow -

Outside the window,
  the bird's nest, a music of hungry
        cries & squeals
  the busy cars honking 
        thirsty for summer rain

The wind turned,
dripping of sun's tears-
        the sky, blue-matted 
                        blanket, times
        another season
                        knitted new
        canvas, bright orange

My eldest placed his new born
child into my arms
       He, feather-light
       Weighs our universe 

They brought him and autumn   
rushed in, tossed its cape of starlings,   
tattered the frost-spackled field.**



* First lines, from Louise Gluck, The Egg
**Ending lines, from The Corn Baby by Mark Wunderlich


Posted for dVerse Poets Pub - OpenLinkNight.  Pub doors open at 3pm EST.  
I missed out on some poetry prompts during my break.   For this poem, I used this one from Amaya's prompt, Bridging the Gap, where I am to use two quotes, one for the opening, and another for the ending, with the poet building the lines in the middle.

26 comments:

  1. I can feel this poem, Grace. You have written it so beautifully. The weight of that baby in your arms, to ground you.....that is so beautiful. Thank heavens for a baby's presence during loss, reminding us of life and love. I could feel your mother's and your brother's sorrow in your description. My condolences to your family, and thank you for the beauty in this poem.

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  2. So much in this poem, the different way of mourning, you and your brother, your mother, and suddenly the way life seems to be passing outside that thin bubble of sorrow. Still the fantastic hope of a newborn in the like a pearl inside your home.

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  3. That's the beauty of OLN, you can pick up on missed prompts, favourite prompts and prompts that seemed tricky but you crack them in the end!

    I enjoyed Amaya's bridge prompt and I love your poem, Grace. with two quotes I didn't recognise but want to investigate further. I especially like the opening quote.

    You have bared your soul in this poem and touched places in mine that have been quietly whispering away in the background with the lines:
    'My hands caught air
    of your fragrance';
    'dripping of sun's tears-
    the sky, blue-matted
    blanket...'
    and
    'My eldest placed his new born
    child into my arms
    He, feather-light
    Weighs our universe'.


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  4. This is so deeply touching. Especially like; "The wind turned, dripping of sun's tears- the sky, blue-matted blanket, times another season knitted new canvas, bright orange."

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  5. Gorgeous images in this poem. I love it, Grace.

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  6. Sure many threads in family coming due. A baby can bring joy, when not screaming lol, even in the toughest times.

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  7. "Static
    that second night
    of mourning
    My hands caught air
    of your fragrance, "

    The entire write brings back memories and these lines struck hard. Yet one cannot help but feel the eight of hope in the new born. Gorgeous.

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  8. This is light, breathless and elusive, like gossamer.

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  9. An evocative elegy, memorializing a moment of grief with truly poignant imagery!

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  10. Oh my--this is beautiful, Grace. (Coincidentally, I just read "The Egg.")
    I love how you've shared and blended the grieving and the joy and wonder of a new life.

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  11. Beyond beautiful Grace. It move me immensely.
    Anna :o]

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  12. This is written with the sad eloquence of mourning...and is beautiful with its gentle words. My thoughts are still with you.

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  13. My eldest placed his new born
    child into my arms
    He, feather-light
    Weighs our universe

    Such a joy to cradle a new-born more so from one of the family's! Great word-craft Grace!

    Hank

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  14. Your poem is beautiful. I especially loved the lines:
    "while my brother silently grieved -
    he's a wounded sparrow"

    Your last two lines are so poignant as well!

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  15. Grieving can be so hard, especially when it is a family member. It is nice that you wove in the baby and the birds to help keep perspective. Well done Grace!

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  16. Grieving takes so much away from us, but also brings to the surface what we never knew was there. It takes time. This is so beautifully written!

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  17. This was like a sorrowful song played softly from the corner of the room, soft and aching to be heard. So much pain and so much love.

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  18. Beautiful, yet heart wrenching.

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  19. Grace,
    I loved the phrasings
    I could feel emotions
    but I could not tell the story
    I could not feel a continuity
    so I read the comments to look for help and found none.

    Being rather analytically mind-bound at times, here is a map of my confusion and question as the poem unfolds:

    0. "View beyond my sister's room" -- hmmm, expecting to have the title help with the poem and find out why soon.

    1. It was your second night of mourning - is "second" important, who or what are you morning?

    2. who fragrance, and why those fragrances -- didn't know bamboo and aloe vera have fragrances.

    3. Mom drags feet in slow circles -- image of Jesus drawing in sand while disciples ask questions -- no... hmm

    4. brother grieves silently -- OH, all three of you are grieving -- hmmmm, the sister? her room? a person?

    5. bird's hunger and squeal: after talking of wounded sparrow as brother. Wait, did a bird die?

    6. Sun doing something. knitting new season, canvas?

    7. Oooops, new born child? Still born, premature? why would baby have those fragrances? Where is your sister in this story -- the title?

    See how handicapped my mind was. And, as I read the comments, I did not see others understanding, or maybe they did, or maybe they were confused and only focused on certain images. Or maybe, we aren't suppose to talk about poetry.

    Anyway, fun puzzle. thanks for indulging me, since you are hosting.

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  20. I like the description of the newborn child as one who "feather-light
    Weighs our universe"

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  21. Eloquent writing, Grace. People mourn differently, which is a. Ital part of this poem. The ending of holding the newborn baby continues the circle.

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  22. What a beautiful poem, Grace, I could feel every nuance in each word as they connected moving me forward in that space. Hope you are well.

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  23. A beautiful poem...so much to love...to wonder about...and yet life goes on.

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  24. Sorry for the delay. You were so kind to check out my poem, but I've been so busy. A wonderful read, very visual.

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  25. This a very poweful and poignant poem, capturing all the nuances of grief and loss juxtaposed with new beginnings and the cycle of life. PS I left a comment before but didn’t see it appear, so I’m back to try again.

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Thank you for your comments and visit. I appreciate them ~