the lagoon
soft sands & shimmering
i lost track of time
forgetting how quickly this
turned to high tides, rocky-rolling
i swallowed salt & seaweeds
are my eyes jelly-red?
where's the boat?
the slumbering sea is now awake
hungry-pressed
for the moon's opaque eyes
Posted for dVerse Poets Pub - Quadrille, hosted by Melissa Lemay. This is a 44 word post, with the chosen word, lagoon. Please join us with your poem when the virutal pub doors open at 3pm EST.
This makes me think of the sea as a hungry creature with the sweet lagoon bouth lure and mouth
ReplyDeleteWow, but that turned dark in a blink of an eye "jelly-red." I definitely felt the undertow of terror in the current of words. Brilliant, Grace.
ReplyDeleteI love the form, layout and the idea of escaping to a lagoon. Grace. The ‘soft sands & shimmering ‘are so alluring. How scary that it turned to ‘high tides, rocky-rolling’.
ReplyDeleteThe lagoon imagery sent me to such a great place!
ReplyDeleteOh, a whole scary story here--beautifully crafted, Grace!
ReplyDeleteI like how you characterized eyes in here. Adds a special oomph to the poem.
ReplyDeleteGrace, your poem is a captivating journey to the lagoon, with its soft sands and shimmering allure. The imagery of losing track of time and the sudden shift to high tides is wonderfully evocative!
ReplyDeleteMuch love,
David
SkepticsKaddish.com
Love the jelly-red eyes detail, and of course the romanticism between the moon and the sea. You share a great story through your words. We never know what the day holds, sometimes things take a turn.
ReplyDeletesoft shimmering sands.....a beautiful lagoon turns somehow a bit terrifying with those jelly red eyes, high tides, swallowing salt and seaweed and then the moon's opaque eyes. Excellent imagery!
ReplyDeleteI found this chillingly beautiful. To drown after indulging in the beauty of nature for too long and to rest there forever under the moon. Excellent writing.
ReplyDeleteThe poem brings me back to my younger times and exploring the Mediterranean coast in a kayak. Lovely poem <3
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written, Grace!
ReplyDeleteWell, that went from calm and care free to scary, but beautiful imagery throughout.
ReplyDeleteWhen the sea invades a lagoon, it's wild and terrifying. Is it hungry? Looking for something? Great imagery.
ReplyDeleteLOVED the ending!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. Love the closing lines, Grace.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully described~ sillyfrog
ReplyDeleteThe power of the tides to tug and sink us comes through in your words. A relatable poem.
ReplyDeleteNicely done, Grace.
ReplyDeleteI was captivated by a sense of losing myself in the moment.
ReplyDeleteHope there's boat & rescue too.
ReplyDeleteWell expressed.
Beware that which is too alluring... Great poem!
ReplyDelete