Thursday, September 10, 2015

Hushed conversations

Grace @ Everyday Amazing

These days, there is a frequent visitor in father's house.   

Every time he knocks on the door, the old man's fragile heart beats rapidly like he is running a race. Yet his father could hardly carry a conversation as his breathing is labored. And his memories are faltering too, repeating:

"I can feel that my feet are on fire!".   His wife answers, "It is just your nerves as you are very anxious."  

But father would insist, "I cannot breathe and sleep at night.  There is something burning in my stomach." He prays fervently, clasping the blessed rosary. He grows thinner, relying on his family to care for him.  He has seen many doctors and priests over the years.   The room smells of candles & devotions.  His children avoid saying anything about hospital bills nor property arrangements.  

They say the visitor's name by now.  Not with a question mark but a period.  


crab apples fall on ground
bruised, speckled by birds-  
autumn arrives with black veil  

Posted for D'verse Poets Pub - Writing Dialogue - Hosted by Victoria Slotto ~


  1. This makes a few chills go through my body, Grace. I don't doubt that Death makes a few visits in advance of its final one. It is one visitor everyone has eventually. Amazing haiku finale.

  2. Death does indeed end with a period, but the question mark is what is on the other side.

  3. Wow, I'm with Mary: chilling. The haibun as form lends itself so well to conversational poetry. The haiku is just perfect. One of those that I wish I'd written.

  4. Excellent writing. The haiku (and I truly mean haiku) at the end is absolute perfection. Not a happy read, but a very intense and true write.

  5. oh Grace this is so chilling, but ultimate truth of life...the haiku part gave me goosebumps...

  6. A moment that awaits us all. A sad and solemn piece indeed. And great haiku!

  7. I"m sure he comes in advance, death is never unprepared.. but we cannot mention his name, that haiku gives it a great contrast.. Wonderful and sad.

  8. A vivid description and some or the other day this visitor will be knocking at our doors.

  9. Morbid feel very apparent.Sometimes life takes a turn one finds most stressful. You got the effects, Grace!


  10. Excellent haiku at the end, it turns the story and lets us see it in a different way, but builds upon it. Sad. I have watched parents die and it is not fun. Not a pleasant visitor in that one.

  11. Great job Grace. To feel Death edge closer must be terrifying. You brought that quiet terror out perfectly.

  12. This is absolutely incredible - what a brilliant haiku close.
    Beautifully penned!

    Lots of love,

  13. Death is sue final, that period happens and all is over

  14. I think in that in many ways.
    This is amazing Grace :)

  15. Ah yes.. death is a visitor
    that will not wait for
    settling affairs
    after last
    but to face it is to live..
    and oh boy.. a real relief
    to those left behind who do
    not have to pick up a thousand
    loose ends and to connect the dots..
    of what
    of been
    done before
    in full honest
    of caring now..:)

  16. The phrase "not with a question mark but a period" and autumns' black veil are powerful images...are we ready for this guest?

  17. This poem has such impact. The scene is set so clearly, you draw the reader right into the room, and then your haiku just knocks it out of the park. Really great writing!

  18. Powerful poem. Keep that unwelcome visitor out for as long as possible. Thanks.

    Greetings from London.

  19. As we face death, we hope that our loved ones will face it with us. Your beautiful poem depicts the unwillingness to discuss death. We must embrace it the same way we embrace birth...another door to open.
    Your haiku is stunning.


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