Thursday, June 4, 2015

The vows at the church


Picture credit:   Ellie Davies


Your voice quivers, caught
in the morning light, dazzling him
In a blue suit, your eyes are diamonds sought 
in deepest mine, where no sun can ever dim
nor night shutter its glorious crystal shade-
Here in midst of family & friends, you disclosed
what has seeded in your heart- a glade
where forest is lit with emerald stars & joy flows
endlessly as full moon tides, what lies
ahead you don't know - bricks or stones -
With you, this moment will never die   
framed & pressed, on your spine, a whetstone,    
on your hands, warm as spring's first bouquet on lawn -
You begin the vows with tearful smiles, fears begone ~


Posted for D'verse Poets Pub- OpenLinkNight hosted by Bjorn Rudberg ~

This challenge was from Imaginary Garden for Real Toads:   using Bout-Rimes with these end words: caught, him, got, dim, shade, goes, glade, flows, lies, stone, dies, tone, lawn, gone

Process Notes:   My eldest son got married over the weekend and it was a lovely family celebration filled with love and gratitude ~

40 comments:

  1. The last line is sure how life should always be, keep on smiling with one another and forget that strife.

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  2. Wonderful use of the words. I am amazed that you managed to turn the darkness of the words into such a wonderful wedding image.. After all the words came from "the death of a toad"... I admire how you managed to make those words your own.

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    1. Interesting to know where those words came from Bjorn ~ Thanks for the challenging form ~

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  3. Beautiful Grace!
    Blessings to your son his new life!!

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  4. it is a holy moment... and i do hope they invest the work and patience and respect it needs to build a healthy marriage... all the best for them...

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  5. Nothing like a son's wedding to cue the tears & lift the spirit. I blubbered like an idiot at all three of my daughter's weddings. Word lists certainly can be creative prompts. Maybe one day we get one for MTB.

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  6. You seem to have done an admirable job with the prompt of a word list, Grace. Smiles...>KB

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  7. The bride of nature knows no no's of life
    or pleasure.. the bride of nature pleases
    all with soft and course ways of fire..
    the groom comes ill prepared but
    learns..:)

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  8. Interesting. We were just watching Little House last night and it was a wedding episode. The drama around the wedding and fears were the main story. It changes everything, so it should be approached with such fear and trembling I believe.

    So this is based on the recent wedding in your life. Very cool.

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  9. Blessings to the newly wed couple! I like how you took potentially dark words and turned them into something reverent, lovely, and happy. How you describe your son is only as a loving mother can describe and only a poet can make richer.

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  10. beautifully cradted lines - was not quite sure which way this was going to go, but that is because of good writing, then the calmness and relief at the end. Very nice - I wonder if the font could be bigger for tired eyes!

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  11. A mystical tour de force, which I hope you will give to the happy couple as a tangible memorial of the significance of the marriage ceremony.

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  12. Lovely Grace and congratulation and good wishes to your son and daughter-in-law. May they have a wonderful life.
    Anna :o]

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  13. This was perfect and beautiful - congratulations.

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  14. "your eyes are diamonds sought
    in deepest mine"

    I love the double meaning in "mine."

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  15. This is beautiful. I love the ending phrase "fears begone." Starting a life together can be scary, so much unknown, but we can't let that stop us. Congrats to your son and to you on gaining a new daughter-in-law. Peace, Linda

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  16. Loved that 'whetstone' change. :-) A crafty story transformation pertinent to your family wedding!

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  17. The opening two lines are a poem on their own.

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  18. For me, this had a magical quality about it--it conjured up fairies or a Ken Follett novel--and then when I read your process note--magic indeed that most embrace, willing to take the risk of commitment. Congrats to your son and his bride...and you. Had to post using Google. Grrr.

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  19. Very well crafted, always difficult when the prompt has multiple words, but this flows so easily.

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  20. Very nice. Love how you put so much into one moment. :-)

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  21. Grace, this is so Gorgeous--congratulations to your son and his bride; wishing your whole family many blessings in the years to come.

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  22. Grace - congratulations to your son. You created a lovely poem from the words that really captured the moment.

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  23. such a beautiful gift of a poem Grace...blessings to the newly wed couple :)

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  24. Your rhymes are so subtle they flow like a gentle breeze. i do like your writing Grace. I rhyme often but differently, use the mid line foreline and sometimes even the normal end line.

    I remember that day, my did shine like diamonds, but I think that was from the 3 shots of Jim beam the best man bought me on the way to the judge.

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  25. How very beautiful. Such a felicitous event! A glorious poem to commemorate it. I especially love "you disclosed
    what has seeded in your heart- a glade
    where forest is lit with emerald stars "

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  26. You incorporated the word list so beautifully and seamlessly into this wedding portrait! My middle son is engaged to be married the end of July :)

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  27. what a beautiful way of describing wedding vows. Simply lovely!!

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  28. "framed & pressed, on your spine, a whetstone," this line is packed with palpable imagery. Just lovely! Thank you for sharing.

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  29. Looking at your original choice of words, I too am stunned that you managed to make a thing of joy and hopefulness out of them! Clearly, poetry and life are very much in the eye of the beholder! A nice turn of the phrases...

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  30. How nice to being able to see a wonderful DIL for which your son had made a correct choice and had got your approval with the wonderful write! Congrats for the newly-weds!

    Hank

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  31. Beautiful take on the words, and I agree with Bjorn. You put the words in a lighter tone than what they spoke to me :) Nice.

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  32. You did very well with 'bout rimés' considering you wanted to tell about this momentous moment in your son's life and yours. You poem speaks of emotions, questions and finally trust.

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  33. You have captured those special moments beautifully, Grace. I do hope that you will share this poem with the newly married couple.

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  34. what an ethereal poem, simply beautiful. Your writing is exquisite, the imagery was brilliant.

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  35. You have imbued one of life's great passages - that of marriage - with a depth of perception and tenderness that only a Mom could realize. Lovely.

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  36. felicitations and congratulations, Grace! I'm sure your at times happy, at times nostalgic for time gone so quickly, and at times relieved it's over. best wishes to the newlyweds ~

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  37. You've captured the moment more effectively than a photograph, but I hope you tot lots of nice pictures to go with it.

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