Monday, October 5, 2015

Caught in a dream



She hovers light as bird in a nest.  Yet her feet are lead, tangled in history of hurts and twigs of betrayals.  It has been 3 years now, but tonight when the moon glints coppery red, the past recoils like black tide shrouding  her vision.   She can hear the whiplash of his words, like a storm circling overhead.  The hard fist of his hands, gnawing fear in her chest.

Slowly, she wipes her mouth with the back of her hand as if to rid of acid-laced memories.    Outside, the wind rattles crushed soda cans on the streets, sweeping them like lost feathers.   She thinks of leaving the city and starting a new life somewhere. A place to call her own with a small garden.   Sinking deep into sleep, she hears the ticking of the clock.  Every second reverberates, as echoes of gunshots.  As heartbeats of runaway prey.


red maple leaves
blanket rose-less garden,
night is tinderbox




                                                                  By Brooke Shaden

"Yesterday is but today's memory, and tomorrow is today's dream." - Quote from Kahil Gibran

Posted for D'verse Poets Pub - Haibun Monday - The prompt is open all week, so come and join us!    Thanks for the visit ~

33 comments:

  1. The night is a tinder box, for sure.
    Definitely escape is one of those things that should not be put off time morning. Tight prose, it def set the tension Grace.

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  2. This read truly made me cry, Grace ... it so much spoke to me ... in many ways ... cuz this ole gypsy girl has been sittin between 2 chairs for way too long ... https://www.youtube.com/embed/k-tZ5zAh-kI?rel=0&controls=0&showinfo=0 ... waiting for everlasting spring ... sumwhere soon ... Love, cat. PS: That link should work 4 u, if u copy and paste it into google search ... :)

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  3. I do hope she is able to find a way to start a new life. The 'echoes of gunshots' sound chilling. And your haiku has a lonely feel.

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  4. Whiplash of his words....

    very powerful

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  5. An abusive relationship is a tough dream to be trapped in...better to wake up and not linger getting out. But there is hope in her "present"...I think she's going to have that place of her own with that small garden.

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  6. Dark & emotional, ts prose crackles with the mixture of hope & despair; I cheer for hope. Because he is batterer, he deserves no sympathy. I adore your lines
    /the wind rattles empty soda cans on the street/sweeping them like lost feathers/.

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  7. This is a really exceptional haibun. The similes and metaphors are so beautifully drawn ... the haiku and prose dovetail wonderfully. An awesome piece.

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  8. It's good that she's able to walk light in spite of her stormy life...the shade of red in the prose and haiku reveals her deep wound...every expression in this haibun exudes beauty...

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  9. This is so dark and yet perfect, to escape his fists.. Maybe nights are the best cloak she'll ever find. Night is tinderbox.. What a wonderful line.

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  10. Nature desolate
    of human hate..
    Nature's way..
    never culture..
    never religion..

    JUST way..
    aLive..:)

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  11. A wonderful piece of writing about a troubling subject.

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  12. Very powerful Grace! In so few words, you etched the painful reality of abuse, the sense of sad hopefulness, the entanglement in the past. Beautiful haiku!

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  13. Vivid writing Grace... The soda cans just complete that picture with the tinderbox night...

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  14. When one needs to get out, sleep should sure be forgotten. Great story.

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  15. Amazing piece, well done. Greetings!

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  16. Such ominous dream...'night - tinderbox'...like 'her feet are lead, tangled in history of hurts and twigs of betrayals' ~ love the haibun matching with expressive picture, sound like a ekphrasis. Great!

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  17. This is so laced with hurt and fear and tension, and longing as well. A beautiful, vivid, dark, portrait. And that ending! Yes, tinderbox.

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  18. This write oozes fear. Made me think of domestic abuse victims, how they often live in fear with awful memories and too often they don't move out of the situation quickly enough. You captured the motion so well Grace.

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  19. Your prose melds well with your haiku. There is a seamless quality to your writing that always draws my attention. Lovely!

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  20. "as heartbeats of runaway prey" - fantastic line. This piece is strongly imbued with mood - you take the reader right into her space. Very cool write.

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  21. Wow-this is so full of images for me, and fear. It feels like it is all unfolding before me with the words you chose. I really like it.

    Nato (https://chasinglifeandfindingdreams.wordpress.com/)

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  22. What a sad life for her - those empty cans, roseless garden. I hope she can find a way to leave that life and step into a new one - one with roses, birds, hope! Incredible haibun.

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  23. Loved it, Grace. How are you today?

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  24. As always, this is so beautiful and deep. Bravo.

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  25. Them that create such a history are doomed to repeat it less they find a ladder out of the trench.

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  26. Dark, deep and filled with tension. Great write.

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  27. Your use of metaphor with the bird and feathers especially is so powerful - speaks to a certain vulnerability. Excellent haibun, Grace!!

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  28. The intricate details, the twisted sad memories, such painfully sad images beautifully constructed. I greatly enjoy reading your words.

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  29. Beautiful and lyrical Grace, enjoyed this very much.

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  30. This is really so painfully powerful ... and your haiku is so perfect. One of the best haibun I've read in a while. Bastet

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