Friday, January 4, 2013

OUTside

The view from my cubicle
Grace @ Everyday Amazing


the noise outside
never ceases - whistling, screeching, thundering 
from cars, trucks

going east or west
always fast -
chasing ticking clock

I don't see - 
muting the snowdrops falling, trembling       
like a dove.


  

Posted for Real Toads - Mary's Mixed Bag - Windows
Poetry form:   La Lune for D'verse Poets Pub - Take 2 for me ~

3 lines of 3-5-3 words or 5-3-5 syllabic count - I have used both.    

39 comments:

  1. The view from you cubicle is like others office I worked many years ago, sometimes I think what would happens If I stiil will be there.
    But you picture so well in your poem:)

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    1. I think your journey would have been different ~ Thanks Gloria ~

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  2. Love the view from your high rise office! However, I do not miss the everyday grind. Happy New Year!!

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    1. I am on the 6th floor, not that high rise around here ~ Thanks Helen and Happy New Year too ~

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  3. There's o much that we don't see in our ceaseless chasing of the mighty dollar (or pound in my case).

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    1. Yes, and specially when the windows are sealed close ~ Thanks Tony ~

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  4. A well done image indeed, both with the picture and text.

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  5. I really enjoyed seeing the photo of the view out your office window, Grace; and your poem definitely does justice to all the sights and sounds you see there as time ticks on!

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  6. An interesting combination of lunes - and I like the way that the three interact, with the third almost being a volta, a turn of phrase and thought, as a counterpoint to the first two strophes. Well done!

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    1. Thank you Sam for the wonderful form ~

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  7. ah very cool...the snow drops trembling like a dove is very cool grace...your words are easy to see...glad i have been out of the traffic a few weeks...smiles.

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    1. Enjoy the break Brian ~ Thank you ~

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  8. I, too, especially loved the snowdrops trembling like a dove........love the view from your cubicle, Grace.

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    1. The view isn't bad Sherry, at least I have a window to look out too ~ Thanks ~

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  9. The second one is my favorite--you capture the speed and sound well with the consonance :)

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  10. What one can see, as they look out of their office tree, it never stops either way, can be quite the display.

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    1. I agree Pat ~ Thanks for the visit ~

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  11. I love seeing photos of people's surroundings so it was neat to see your office view. Never worked in that kind of situation myself but your describe is well so I can picture it. I like the trembling snow as well.

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  12. How nice you're posting your own photos lately. Trembling like a dove--you or the snowdrops? It can be interpreted both ways, I think, and is a lovely line :)

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    1. I think its fun to take pictures like you and post it in the blog ~

      Thank you for the visit ~

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  13. I wish I had a view outside from my cubicle although it would be of a parking lot haha.

    Very nice lines here. I like your poem. I can feel the overstimulation in your words!

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  14. I had a view like that once upon a time.

    I love how talented you are, Grace! You do these verses with such ease. Well done.

    Have a beautiful weekend!!

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    1. I think once you put your mind into something, you can do it too Elsie ~

      Thanks for the visit ~

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  15. ..outside's a totally different world... everything's trembling...rushing... creating noises... and yes... you too suits to the form so perfectly well... it shows Grace... great... great... as always... smiles...

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    1. Thank you for the lovely words Kelvin ~ Good morning to you ~

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  16. loved that you used both forms... and Grace, the 3rd one is just so damn good! great write

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  17. We look through a window and breathe trapped air wondering what we are missing...beautiful piece Grace.

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  18. ..this form is fitting for your track of thought, I think; you bring so much to it already and it takes it away if you will ;)

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  19. So often the view from the workplace is less than gratifying.. at least a poet has other places to go.

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  20. Those sealed windows give me claustrophobia. We had them in one of our local colleges, and I had great difficulty keeping calm whenever went there. Nightmare! Thank goodness those at work opened - if only marginally, due to health and safety's ludicrous rules after one employee up country decided to try and jump from their window!!
    I liked the way your mind worked around this subject.

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  21. How wonderfully this form contains the noise, the sight, but you see the doves cooing in the snowflakes anyway. Mighty fine!

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  22. beautiful. I love the glimpse out the window (both in sight and sound). I particularly liked the muted snowdrops.

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  23. That you can block it and see the beauty that you do is such an amazing blessing, Grace. Beautiful poem.

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  24. yeah, i like this, Grace. i have a bucolic view from my office window but go figure, the computer is on the opposite side so my back is usually turned. blah.

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  25. I can remember thinking a city view exciting, early in my working life. Now, with those years gone, your photo looks overwhelming. I love the snowdrops "like a dove"!
    K

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  26. Really like the line "chasing ticking clock". It has a kind of cyclical feel-like a cat chasing its tail or something. Very nice work.

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Thank you for your comments and visit. I appreciate them ~